Here’s a short list of things that I think are worse than a punch in the face. In no particular order:

• Ice chips in milk because the fridge is too cold
• Lettuce on a day old sandwich
• Red light cameras
• Inaccurate DVR stopping during a fast forward
• People who stop in the middle of a busy sidewalk to look up
• Insurance of any kind

If someone told me I could get punched in the face and never have to deal with anything on the list again, I’d take it in a heartbeat.

I’m sure I’ll think of some more…

Being a person who likes to leave some humor behind I’d want to give people something to talk about when they went home afterwards.

So, keeping that in mind, for my last meal, I’d eat a pound of garlic.

• Tapatio
• Louisiana Hot Sauce

Judging on 4 criteria:

• Flow out of the bottle
• Consistency
• Flavor
• Web site (just because)

Meet the Team

Tapatio

Louisiana Hot Sauce

Flow out of the bottle

Tapatio takes this one, it comes out much smoother than Louisiana Hot Sauce.

Consistency

Louisiana Hot Sauce wins for consistency. Unfortunately, for Tapatio, flowing out of the bottle well means it’s a little watery.

Flavor

They’re both very vinegary. If I have to take one, I’ll go with Tapatio. But they’re pretty much the same.

Web site

Tapatio gets this one by a very narrow margin, only because Louisiana Hot Sauce doesn’t have a dedicated site, it has a product page buried in a larger site. Development-wise Tapatio gets crushed for using flash. And we hate flash. In the battle between site & page… site will win every time.

Results

They’re almost exactly the same.

Maybe I’ll switch back to Cajun Sunshine, at least it’s a little different.

Last week I was at Ralph’s to buy some some baby carrots and dip. I figured I’d eat the first one pretty quick, so I decided to get a second bag, freeze it and eat it maybe next week.

Apparently when you freeze baby carrots they lose all consistency and turn into a gross rubber-like substance. Not a pretty sight.

Proof:

And that’s how I learned that.

I did not taste them.

Ingredients

• 4 tablespoons flour
• 4 tablespoons sugar
• 2 tablespoons cocoa
• 1 egg
• 3 tablespoons milk
• 3 tablespoons oil
• 3 tablespoons chocolate chips (optional)
• A small splash of vanilla extract
• 1 large coffee mug (MicroSafe)

Directions

1. Add dry ingredients to mug, and mix well. Add the egg and mix thoroughly.
2. Pour in the milk and oil and mix well.
3. Add the chocolate chips (if using) and vanilla extract, and mix again.
4. Put your mug in the microwave and cook for 3 minutes at 1000 watts.
5. The cake will rise over the top of the mug, but don’t be alarmed!
6. Allow to cool a little, and tip out onto a plate if desired.
7. EAT ! (this can serve 2 if you want to feel slightly more virtuous).

• Organic milk
• A haircut
• A good shirt

Why?

Organic Milk

I went through a period where I was only eating organic food; I won’t lie, I felt pretty healthy. But there’s a lot of stuff I just don’t think it’s worth paying extra for organic food. Milk isn’t one of them. Mainly milk, beef and chicken, I think, are all worth the money to get organic. There are a ton of chemicals, hormones and general junk in milk that I’m just not too keen on ingesting (especially considering how much milk I drink).

Haircut

I’ve have a lot of haircuts in my 27 years on this planet. I’ve been to supercuts, I’ve cut my own hair and I’ve been to the critically acclaimed Boston stylist, Anita Kurl (voted best men’s hair cut in 2008). Anita Kurl is, by a landslide, the best haircut I’ve ever had, it’s so good that I flew from LA to Boston a few months ago, and I had to get a haircut while I was there. It’s actually priced very reasonably. But my point here is that a haircut can make you feel like a new man; it can fix a crappy day and you’ll feel great. For that reason, I have no problem spending a chunk of money on a good haircut.

If you’re in Boston, make an appointment at Anita Kurl, ask for Derek, he’s the best. Tell him Tim from Raleigh/LA sent you.

A good shirt

I don’t know about you, but I wear my clothes until they fall apart. You can’t put a price a good shirt; you wear them for years and they should last for years. I used to be completely against dropping $60+ on a shirt, but after getting a couple. They’re usually very high quality. I’m not a brand person at all, I don’t care if a shirt is Calvin Klein, Polo, J.Crew, whatever. Completely irrelevent. If you find a good shirt, pick it up, you;ll wear it for years. They really do last longer than your averge T-shirt from Target (which I have tons of as well).

A lot of times I measure value by how long I’ve had something. If I’ve had it 1 day for ever dollar it cost, I call that worth the money. If I wear a $50 shirt 50 times, I’m good to go. Worth it’s weight in gold.